fine, I'll talk about LeBron

Ok despite my constant complaining about the absurdity of professional sports, I still pay some attention to the NBA. And the reactions to this whole LeBron to Miami thing are so fucking stupid. Take this, from a recent Bill Simmons mailbag:

City: Cleveland

Name: Paul
I'm 25 years old. I'm about to re-enlist for another tour overseas with the Army. I have an idea of what matters and what doesn't.

But this still hurts. Nothing stings worse than when one of your own rips your heart out. Not like this ...

Maybe I should do what's best for me and get out of the Army. Unfortunately, loyalty is driving me to do one more tour.

LeBron knows nothing of that word.

Where do I even start? You have an idea what matters because you're part of a death machine that is occupying countries across the globe to serve the interests of American corporations? And despite your brilliant grip on "what matters," you think it matters what uniform a professional basketball player wears? Whether the professional sports team from your city throws a ball through a hoop more often than any other? And "loyalty"? Loyalty to what, your employer? Fuck that.

And then this whole "Jordan would have wanted to beat Wade, not join him" thing is amusing too. You want to know something about Jordan? He's a fucking asshole. His teammates hated him and were terrified of him. He wanted to destroy everyone, and he did. Uh... great? LeBron seems just to be a nice, though hideously self-absorbed, guy who wants to hang out with his friends in a fun city. And this is supposed to be a bad thing? Go play ball in Miami, LeBron! Who fucking cares what Jordan would have done.