Online Poker Screen Names 3

When you sign up to play poker at an online casino, you pick a screen name that other players see when you sit at a table. Here are some names I've played against. Players in red are losers in games I've played; green are winners.

(Online Poker Screen Names 1)

(Online Poker Screen Names 2)



Sexual/Vulgarity:

• jizmaster - Pretty much speaks for itself

• AssPoker - Pretty much speaks for itself. The AssPoker won a lot when we played. It was a lovely experience.
  

• NutsKickerNL - Curiously this guy was playing limit, when I saw him, not no-limit (NL). Maybe that's why he was losing.
  

• ea8tshtndie - Had to throw that 8 in there because eatshitanddie, eatshitndie, and eatshtndie must have been taken.
  

• eatmynuts1 - Once again, resorting to adding numbers because some other genius beat you to the original idea.
  

Drugs:

• GAMBOL4CRACK - Is there any other reason to gambol?

• cokedupninja - This is just a great name. Bravo.

Messages:

• DontEatMeat - In response to his suggestion, I'll quote Reel Big Fish: "Maybe I'm a murderer, but I'm hungry and they're better off dead." Maybe some protein would help your results, buddy.
  

• spirituality - Allah helps me hit my flushes.

• Jeter_Loves_LilBoys - I didn't actually play with this guy, but I saw him sitting in a game and his message rang true to me. But I suspect most of you already knew that Jeter is a homosexual pedophile.
  

• lysbexic - This noble public servant has taken it upon himself to warn the world about the dangers of dyslexia.

Weird:

• ryanquirk - I assume the guy's name is Ryan Quirk. What kind of weird last name is Quirk?

Funny References:

• Pete Rose - Insert your favorite Pete Rose gambling joke.

• bobamilktea - I don't know if this is why he picked this name, but there is a woman who walks through the Commerce Casino selling that stuff. In her thick Asian accent, she yells "boba tea... milk tea... boba MILK tea!!" Mildly amusing but curiously memorable. Adverbially speaking.
  

• cunningstunts - I didn't play with this guy either, but I recognized the classic punchline: What is the difference between a circus and a cheerleading team? A circus is a bunch of cunning stunts...

• chewygotu - What a wookie!