terrible poker post, DO NOT READ

seriously I can't imagine anyone would want to read this. fair warning. halfway down there's a list of reason to read it. i'll highlight it in red. if any of those apply to you, maybe give the rest of it a read.

I've been sitting at a table for close to two hours now, with a huge fish directly on my right. He played almost 90% of his hands, and calls til the river with any hand. He'll bet, raise or check-raise only when he has a huge hand, 3 of a kind or better. Nobody else at the table has been better than mediocre.

I have nothing to show for this. Having position on this guy I've been raising quite frequently (27% of my hands) to isolate, and only 1 other player seems aware that I'm doing this. But the fish has made enough miracle hands against me that I've only managed to break even. It is getting pretty frustrating, especially since I got beat up tonight on a couple other tables and this one should be helping make up for those..

This is just a stupid bad beat story. Nobody wants to read it but writing it has theraputic properties. I've been on a terrible run lately so I need whatever edge I can get. In fact since I started writing it, things have turned around a bit. Nope, nevermind, some idiot just called with pocket deuces til the river and spiked a set. Woohoo!

If you're still reading there's an excellent chance that one of the following applies to you:

• excessive gay love for me
• hate me cause of the bad things I said about God and want to bask in my misery like a good Christian
  
• really really bored at work
• computer is frozen and you are glued to your chair
• you just really love bad beat stories

Hooray I just flopped a set against this idiot. Uh-oh he check-raised me. Guess I'll call down and see his straight. Yup.

[note: it gets a lot worse from here]

The idiot has now lost 67 big bets at this table, I'm sitting on his right, and I've lost 4. Awesome. This is pathetic. I am terrible at this game.

Yay he just check-called to the river w/A5 on a 678T5 board against my K9. Now I'm only down 1 bet. I just flopped a set of Kings now. Turn made a flush, sweet. Yup, I lose to 8-2 suited. Fuck me. Great the next hand some guy bet-3bet the Q52 flop with T7 and turned a T to beat my A4 flush draw. Thanks to the river 4 for making me call.

Oh boy here is AA. T7 guy 3bet me, fish calls, I cap. Board KJ6Q6 I put in lots of bets Fish boy bet the river with T9. I guess I should have folded. T7 guy mucked. Dear fucking god.

I don't really know when to stop in these situations. I've lost so much money tonight, but this is such a good table. How can I leave this seat? The fish has now lost 85 BBs, and I've lost 17 here, plus another 40 on other tables. I might as well just get a job.

There's my top 2 pair KJ losing to T4, who raised preflop. Awesome.

KJ again. Isolate! Some guy cold-calls and then raises the flop! Fold! Lose!

Alright fuck it. Nothing good will come of keeping playing. Wow what a terrible night. 67 big bets lost tonight, and 160 big bets in under 48 hours, erasing everything I had won in January so far. Seriously, anyone want to hire me?