Yao Ming!!!!!!

Yao Ming is probably my favorite NBA player now, behind Juan of course. He's 7'6" and 310lbs. What a fucking beast. Plus he's a good shooter and he's Chinese. You know what else? He plays with Shane Battier. I've hated that guy for so long that now I love him. That's another notch on Yao's massive Chinese belt. Yao is a nice guy and he lives in Houston. If you were Yao and you were my friend, you'd be my best friend. Yao likes to shake hands with small white men who seem amused by his massive size. Yao loves to make brilliant passes, using his supreme vantage point to create unprecedented geometrical angular situations. If you were 7'6" tall and you were my friend, you'd create angular situations and be my best friend. Plus you might get dizzy if you stood up too fast. I wonder how much Yao eats. I wonder if Chinese women love Yao as much as I do. Yao's feet bare a massive burden. You know how Denver is like a mile high and that makes it hard to respirate? Do you think that means it is harder for Yao to breathe than for Earl Boykins? Earl is my least favorite NBA player, except for Duke Jason Williams. If I was Yao, I'd smite them both. But Yao is a fucking pacifist, which is why I have so much respect for him. Plus he's Chinese.